Cambodian history is so depressing that I'd challenge anyone to not be moved to tears by it. The current state of the country today as a result of that history is so disheartening that it's difficult to see even a tiny ray of hope for the future. The Cambodian people themselves certainly can't. They say there some countries, cultures and people who will tug at your heart strings. Cambodians didn't just do this: they reached right to our hearts and opened them up, climbed inside, made themselves comfortable and locked the door behind them. For now that they're in there, it'll be a job to ever get them out. Our time in this incredible country? - it was incomparable, it was an emotional roller coaster and it was the greatest (and saddest) experience we've ever had.
Cambodia has been exploited for centuries. It's been at war with its neighbours, Thailand and Vietnam, more times than anyone bothers to count, usually because these two more powerful nations want to help themselves to land and destroy the stunning architecture. I never realised how many places in these two countries are actually occupied Cambodian lands. On top of this, the USA dropped millions of tonnes of bombs and landmines on Cambodia during the Vietnam War in order to flush out the Communists, many of which are still 'live' today. However, if it were just other countries that abused Cambodia, it might not be in as bad a state as it is. What really destroyed this country was its own people.
The Khmer Rouge took over as leaders of Cambodia in 1975. They were, to put it simply, freaks. These Communist leaders - the head honcho being a prat named Pol Pot - wanted to install a new social order where every person worked in the rice fields. The entire population was forced into farming labour camps. Schools, hospitals, industries and banks were closed; currency was burned so nobody had claim to anything. They believed the quickest way to achieve this goal of agricultural Communism was genocide. Over the next four years, it is estimated that nearly a third of the entire population was wiped out. 95% of educated people were murdered along with their families (except the educated Khmer Rouge members, of course.) Even those who wore glasses were executed because the Khmer Rouge believed this was a symbol of learning. Can you imagine all of this happening in your country? Suspected dissidents were tortured in the infamous S21 prison - when we visited here we saw pictures of people with half of their faces torn off. Millions of human beings were massacred at the place now known as 'The Killing Fields' where piles of bones and skulls can still be seen. Those who weren't butchered generally died from disease and starvation as a result of insufficient agricultural knowledge and from working like slaves. This isn't history: this was all happening in our lifetime.
In 1979, the Khmer Rouge started feuding with the Vietnamese; not just in a bid to get back land but out of pure and simple hatred for them. It was another sign of Khmer Rouge stupidity because let's face it, if there's one thing the Vietnamese know how to do it's fight a war. The conflict that ensued meant even more landmines were sown across Cambodia but, as expected, the Vietnamese sent the Khmer Rouge scarpering. In one sense, Vietnam was therefore the 'liberator' of the Cambodian people. However, other motives (most notably more land annexation and resource exploitation) came to the fore when they ruled Cambodia for ten years and more people were dying in what was intrinsically an invasion by these simultaneous saviours. Sure, this new regime was the lesser of the two evils but as the Cambodian saying goes: "..to go in the water there is the alligator (Vietnam) and to go on the land there is the tiger (Khmer Rouge.)" Worse still for the local people, the rest of the world continued to acknowledge the Khmer Rouge as the real leaders of Cambodia and they kept their seats in the UN even though they were still waging a guerilla war. This was primarily because the US, after their loss in the Vietnam War, refused to do anything to help the country while their nemesis ruled; Washington didn't want "those (Vietnamese) puppets" who were allied with Moscow to have any more power. What about the Cambodian people, the victims of the brutal genocide? The big powers didn't give a monkeys about them because the Khmer Rouge was now allied with China and China was America's new buddy. The States banned all aid agencies from entering Cambodia to help the sufferers. Sadly, the UN allowed Cambodia to be represented before the world by psycho killers. Western nations, including our own led by Margaret Thatcher, even voted repeatedly to keep the Khmer Rouge seats. Only Sweden refused after it listened to the outcries of its people.
Finally, in 1990, after the Vietnamese became frustrated enough to leave, the US reversed its policy of political and tacit military support of the Khmer Rouge and the world chose to acknowledge the savage, cruel and inhumane murder of millions of people. The UN came in and started trying to improve the country. They pumped in money but a lot of it filled the pockets of fiercely corrupt government officials. Nevertheless, in 1993, democratic elections were held and 90% of the electorate dared to have a voice. A new government came in and Cambodia has since had some semblance of stability and peace.
Peace? Is it really 'peace'? After the UN left, the world just seemed to forget about Cambodia as other events around the world took people's interest. Corruption has been a mainstay of the government since the mid-1990s, meaning the people have barely improved their lives due to disappearing foreign aid. Tourism grows steadily as a result of the country's stability but for all those beautiful, luxury hotels being built each year, practically none of that income filters down to making life better for the average Cambodian. Just walk ten minutes away from the tourist hotspots and you'll see people who live in total poverty.
Some homes in rural areas are now 'developed enough' to have metal roofs. 90% of Cambodia's roads remain unpaved. Rice-growing families earn just a few hundred dollars in a year - and that's only during a good year.
There are up to six million estimated landmines remaining in Cambodia which maim and kill people on a regular basis. A third of them are children. The number of amputees in Cambodia is one of the highest of any nation. The rates for women dying in childbirth and for children dying before the age of five are one of the worst on the planet. It is commonplace for children to be stolen - even in hospitals - from new mothers and sold to adoption agencies catering to the unknowing Western market. What if you were that parent? Child trafficking, paedophilia and exploited street kids: just a few of the things that define Cambodia today.
Survivors of the genocide are now in their 40s and it's estimated that nearly 50% suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder. Even sadder, this is being passed down and the succeeding generations are showing the same type of symptoms. This PTSD translates into sky-high rates of drunkenness and domestic abuse. Children of Khmer Rouge survivors have grown up with violent parents and by 2010, after the new generation had arrived, officials estimated that approximately one-third of the nation's men frequently beat their wives and children. That's amongst the highest rate in the world. That was only two years ago.
Pol Pot died just shy of his 73rd birthday. He lived to this ripe old age without ever being brought to trial. Many of his victims didn't even live to see their first birthdays. This is the man who came up with the KM slogan: 'To keep you is no benefit; to kill you is no loss.' Surviving Khmer Rouge leaders live in protected mansions in Phnom Penh. Many Cambodians live in a one-room house with families of up to twelve people. Some Khmer Rouge governors were pardoned for their crimes; others have in recent years been brought to trial but given useless sentences not even worthy of mention. Is it any wonder the people have no self-worth? Now they simply let the government do whatever it wants to them and they remain victims.
A culture riven with traumatic mental illnesses offers a bleak view of the future. Cambodians don't value themselves enough to fight or expect better. They believe their country is on the edge of a cliff and just one more bit of abuse will send it plummeting to its death. Are they wrong? There's currently a lot of political posturing from both Thailand and Vietnam, showing signs of another potential attack. I don't know how much more these people can take. They dared to have hope one time when the democratic elections were held but once again they were betrayed by their own people. Time and time again their own government chooses to damage the country further rather than improve it by lining its own pocket and deserting the people. It's as though Cambodia is just existing; simply waiting for the end. It's heartbreaking to see.
We, in the Western world, feel hard done by if we can't afford to buy an even more expensive car or we see therapists because our parents didn't throw us enough birthday parties. Cambodian kids would kill just to have parents to bless them whenever they sneeze. We complain because we don't think we have 'enough.' But isn't it enough that we're given the right to choose whether we live or die? To choose our own jobs and paths in life? Or to see our children grow up? There's only one thing every human being is 'owed' in life and that's the opportunity to live it, and it's just so wrong that in 2012 Cambodians barely have this. As one local told me sadly: "I can never escape this because my generation will never be able to afford it. Neither will the next generation.. and probably not the one after that."
And so, with all this knowledge weighing heavily on our minds, we went to Siem Reap in Cambodia, the home of the NGO with which we had elected to do two weeks' voluntary work. We expected to be greeted with misery and suffering; to be honest, it was precisely because of this that we chose Cambodia in the first place. No other place seemed to need as much help. Wounds so deep take a long time to heal. We signed up with Globalteer, the head organisation of various NGOs around the world (thank you, Farah, for the benefit of your experience.) We had signed up to build water filters in local villages but upon arrival found there had been a bit of a muddle-up with our application and we were instead due to teach at a school called Grace House. Everything happens for a reason, right? I guess it was where we were meant to be in order to learn as much as we did that fortnight. What better way for Cambodia to really touch us than through its kids?
I said we expected hardship and gloom. Do you know what we got? We got resilience, joy and kindness; we got warmth, talent, energy and love. We found Cambodian people to be the most amazing we've ever encountered in the world. They may not have much hope for their own futures but they don't have chips on their shoulders: they showered us with happiness and positivity. They humbled us to our very cores. We were metaphorically down on our knees in respect and admiration for the spirit and incredible nature of these people. And the kids? My God, the kids were just unbelievable. Every traveller we've met who's been to Cambodia says: "The people are great and the kids are really special, aren't they?" 'Special' just doesn't do them justice. They're something else. On a superficial level they may well be the cutest kids anyone's ever seen but it's their abundant inner sparkle that is most beautiful.
Every morning we'd leave our Globalteer digs and ride our bicycles through dusty villages where women cleaned outside their homes and men threw nets into local rivers hoping to catch some fish. The sun beamed down on us, birds cheeped, and chants from nearby Buddhist temples echoed in our ears as we rode past, tooting our little bicycle horns. We'd turn into Grace House and be greeted by swathes of children yelling "Hello, teacher!" with huge smiles. It wasn't just our school kids: in two weeks there wasn't one single incident where we passed a kid on a street who didn't smile, wave, shout hello and run alongside us happily bellowing out all the English phrases he or she knew.
Imran and I were in different classes. He was teaching a slightly older group and I was given the task of teaching the school's more "unruly and difficult" younger group. We both tried hard to keep an emotional distance from them but it was a futile attempt; it just wasn't possible for us not to fall in love with these fantastic children.
Imran was a brilliant teacher! There was just something about him that his kids felt connected to and from the very first day he had them hanging around his neck, showering him with love and joy. He worked with another volunteer named Sally, from Liverpool, who was not only a great teacher herself but just a fantastic person to be around. They were teaching their class about muscles and came up with creative ways to combine learning, exercise and mathematics (of course!) Every day I could hear Imran's class screaming and shrieking with laughter as they were engaged in strength competitions. It took no time at all for his students to start writing him notes telling him how much they loved him. I've never seen him so moved.
I was working with another volunteer called Lynn and together we had our class making lots of mess and noise during our topic of Jungle Animals. I took several days to just observe the kids and get to know each one individually where possible, and I felt that this unruly reputation was unjustified. But then, that's just me - I like hyper kids! I thought it was good for them to occasionally have an escape, to enjoy their time learning at Grace House because I didn't know what they were going home to. It was so painful at times to look at them and think they were potentially going home to violence. Who knew how many of those girls would end up in the sex trade? Who knew what would come of the exceptionally bright ones - more intelligent than I ever thought possible for kids of their age - in this land of no opportunity? There was no point reading them stories that began: "I got out of bed.." because none of them had a bed. There was no point asking them what they wanted to be when they grew up because most of them had no ambition; the rest sadly said "tour guide." We never told any kids off for being late to class or tired during lessons because a lot of them worked manual jobs made for adults for hours beforehand.
On a happier note, Imran's class had taken to calling him Teacher Aladdin and that, by default, made me Teacher Jasmine! I think it was because of Imran's curly hair; it certainly wasn't because of any toned abs on my part. The other volunteers found this absolutely hysterical and that's how we became known. So that's our next fancy-dress costumes sorted!
Our last day at Grace House was very emotional - for us, anyway; the kids are used to seeing people come and go. There were some to whom we'd become especially close and they begged us to stay. The girls gave us goodbye letters and pictures; a group of young boys in Imran's class sat on a bench with huge frowns and their heads in their hands. "We are very sad!" they kept wailing theatrically. Imran went over and sat with them and I have no idea what he said but they managed to smile. Perhaps he promised he'd come back next time on his magic carpet. Still, they walked away with heavy sighs whilst dragging their feet. All males the world over are drama queens!
In my classroom I was just doing whatever I could to not cry like a muppet. Somehow I managed but I'll never know how, especially when I got this parting gift from the youngest girl in my class. She walked over to where I was sitting with a beautiful smile on her gorgeous face, lifted up her filthy hands and held my face, then kissed me and said: "See you next year, teacher... please?"
As you can imagine, we didn't do a lot of touristy stuff in Siem Reap. We spent every evening in town with other volunteers but we saw the place in a very different light to other people. It pissed us right off when tourists were taking pictures of the street kids as though they were a circus act. Buying from them was even worse as it only exacerbated the begging culture and reliance on tourists and, even worse, the money was going to the adults exploiting them. There's no excuse to not make an effort to be clued-up about such things before you visit a country in this day and age. Going by the reputation, we expected to be hassled by street kids all the time but we weren't harassed even once. I don't know whether our experience of Siem Reap was very different to other visitors because we were effectively living there but I was glad for it regardless.
We took one weekend out to see the sights and go off the beaten track a little. The Landmine Museum is run by an ex-soldier named Aki-Ra who's doing whatever he can to make Cambodia landmine-free. He's effectively 'adopted' a load of kids who became orphaned through landmine explosions or who were rejected by their communities or dumped on the streets after losing limbs to such bombs. There were over 2.7 million tonnes of bombs dropped on Cambodia by the US alone - you'll get some perspective of this when I say that 'only' around 2 million tonnes were dropped during the whole of World War II. To clear all the unexploded ones and demine the country will take another ten to twenty years if the current level of funding is maintained ($30 million per year.) Bill Clinton even said it himself: Cambodia may well be the most heavily bombed country in history.
We also visited the Angkor temples at sunrise. Angkor Wat is the most well-known and, although impressive, is simply a grand and majestic place the King built for himself. The temples with far more character - and our favourite - were Bayon and Ta Prohm . The latter is the 'Tomb Raider' temple and though it may be fun to think about Angelina Jolie jumping and jiving around here, it also houses rubble from the remains of a war with the Thais. The name Siem Reap translates literally as 'Siam (Thailand) defeated.' How's that for a showcase of pride?
You might have noticed that Imran and I like to throw ourselves in at the deep end when it comes to trying new things. Cambodia was no exception. We've never ridden motorbikes before but - spurred on by our adventurous friend, JD - decided the best way to learn was to do a 12 hour ride around the Cambodian jungles and mountains and then come back at night through Siem Reap town amongst all the crazy traffic. We were driving on ground that would be tough to even walk on as we negotiated our way deep into forests. The destination was a 'hidden elephant temple' which had only been discovered two years previously. On one hand, it was really cool to think we were going where only a tiny handful of people had been before. No doubt in a few years, when the guarantee of cleared landmines there is 100% and the route has been paved, it'll be a big tourist attraction. However, on the other hand, the ride was so tough that the bumps, bruises, scars and scratches on my legs are still hurting two weeks later! Still, going by the amount of times I fell off the motorbike and it landed on top of me, I'm grateful my injuries are so minor!
We decided to be blessed by a Buddhist monk. I say 'we' - despite Imran's objections - as I fully intended to partake in this ceremony but, on the day, I had a cold and was informed I'd have buckets of cold water poured over my head for ten minutes. So poor old Imran had to take one for the team! We'd gone with several other volunteers and it was meant to be a very spiritual experience; if you know Imran you'll know that it was a bit less spiritual and a bit more entertaining! Everybody sat with their hands clasped together in prayer and the monk began reciting whilst filling the tub with water... then SPLASH! Over and over again. Whilst the other people retreated into their personal meditative spaces with great seriousness, Imran was busy both laughing and shaking his head in annoyance, staring at me with an 'I can't believe you made me do this!' look. The more he reacted, the more the monk singled him out for wet attention. Soaked right through by the end of it, he had to take his dripping ass back to our digs to change in the middle of the school day. Not sure he's forgiven me yet!
On our final night a big group of us went out to sing our hearts out in a karaoke bar. There was a big turn-out of other volunteers and a few Cambodian staff from Grace House. Considering we'd only been there for a fortnight we were very touched by the fuss and effort everyone made over our departure. Perhaps they were just happy to see the back of us! It was a great night and we were saddened to say bye to some really admirable people and new friends. But let me just tell you the story of how we found a karaoke bar...
Imran always seems to lead me to places with prostitutes, doesn't he? We cycled home from school one afternoon and stopped by a karaoke lounge we'd heard of. Something about it just screamed 'DODGY!' to me so I refused to go any further than the front gate but Imran insisted it was fine and headed indoors. Little did I know what was going on inside! Nobody spoke any English so Imran had to mime a karaoke sing-along. They got that and led him into a room. As he was flicking through the song list, the lights turned off, music began playing and he was brought a microphone. "Um.. I don't actually want to sing right this minute!" he tried to explain but they had no idea what he was saying. 'I'll just find out how much it is and then get out of here,' he thought. So he rubbed his thumb and first two fingers together and said: "How much?" The very next second, five women in very skimpy tops and hot pants all walked in and the music was turned up. All I saw from outside was Imran legging it out of the building shaking his head and hands frantically, yelling "Hookers!" at me. We all laughed a lot at my poor husband's expense! Luckily, we managed to find another karaoke bar in town.
There are many nations in the world that have sad legacies as a result of their dark histories. I know there are countries suffering right now. But how can it be that large parts of Cambodia only had schools for the first time in the 1990s? While we were busy celebrating the new millennium with all the modern developments at our disposal, Cambodians were still wondering what was coming next. I know it's not the last time we'll visit this country and its magnificent people but we need to always make sure that the fine balance of volunteering helpfully and further promoting the reliance culture is not tipped the wrong way.
Thank you, Cambodia. More specifically, thank you to the extraordinary children who stole our hearts in two short weeks. Through you we learned what life's real priorities are and to find happiness in the smallest of ways. You humbled us more than we ever believed possible. It's easy to say we appreciate all that we have in life but never before have we been forced to so fully confront our abundance and thank God with a desperate relief that we were born into a different life. It was one thing to always say and believe that we were fortunate but to actually feel it was a whole different story. Life is a lottery and we have opportunities you won't ever have simply because we got lucky in that lottery. Thank you for allowing us to further cultivate that most important of attributes in life: love.
When the bell rang to signify the end of class, the kids would line up on the steps and say the same thing everyday. It sums up our feelings about our Cambodian experience perfectly: "Goodbye. Good luck for you; good dreams for me."
* If you wish to make a donation to help the Cambodian people, we recommend the following organisations. We've researched them thoroughly to ensure they support sustainable projects so that the people are helped to build their own lives rather than live on handouts and that your money is correctly handled. Grace House was amazing and a great NGO to which to donate but it lacks for nothing; we feel that improving the villages and lives for women is more important. And, of course, it's essential the world pitches in to help clear those landmines. *
www.landmine-relief-fund.com (the payment agency for www.cambodialandminemuseum.org)
www.thetrailblazerfoundation.org
http://abcsandrice.wwebs.com
www.wrccambodia.org
Please watch the short video on this website.
Your articles and photos are always amazing ! It is a real pleasure to follow your trip, thank you so much !
ReplyDeleteEglantine (met in Rio, to come and visit in France!)
Hi Tina, thanks for your nice message and glad you're still reading (and enjoying) the blog!
DeleteAre you back at home now? What we want to know is: 1) did you ever find a good meal of your own and not eat Charles' and 2) did he ever succeed in charming you?! Hope you're well. We're definitely planning a trip to France before the end of the year. X